I find it difficult to keep it to 5 so I'll categorize. Most need no explaination.
Brian "the brain" Billick
Jack Del Rio
Housh & the Douche (Douche = Chad)
Eli (for being a cry-baby when drafted by San Diego)
Anyone who puts on a Raiders, Ravens, Browns, Bengals, Cowboys or Patriots Uniform
The list continues, that's just off the top of my head.
Following chaos' rubric:
Fart Modell (I know he's gone, but, c'mon)
That retard on the Cincy line biting Polamalu's hairstyle
Smellway (funny how the hissy fit to start his career has been airbrushed from history)
Captain Chaos, for bringing up David