MGS FFL Playoff preview SPECTACULAR!!!

[pensodyssey]

In what has proved to be thee most balanced season in MGS FF history (or as far back as my drunken ass can remember), the playoff matchups are set.  First, though, a look at those teams who didn't make into the top 75% of the league.

Jar's Greatest Show closes early, thanks in large part to under-acheivers Steve Smith (of CAR) and Brandon Jacobs.  Good news is, he now has a clear path to the #1 overall with only one potential keeper (Mendenhall) and therefore the rights to Matthew Stafford.

Key players missing playoffs:  Matt Schaub?

The Assaholics of AJ went down despite the AFC West juggernaut at QB of Hasselprick and Alex Smith.  He may not have any keepers (Gore and Grant both showed an injury tendency) going into next year, the second year running.

Key players missing playoffs: Gore and Grant.

Scac's Hungry Hungry Ho's looked a sure thing for the playoffs with Romo and his #1, Roy Williams, plus Tony Gonzalez and the RB stable of Forte, Portis, and Ricky Williams, but the two former would only combine for 150 points, the result of playing for the Redskins and Bears, respectively.

Key players missing playoffs: Romo, Gostkowski

In perhaps the biggest surprise of all, Bonzr's Lame-ass Swedes will have to watch the stat tracker from home without participating in week 14, despite out-pointing the four teams directly ahead of him.  Bonzr will have some major soul-searching to do this offseason to figure out why his teams consistently play down to their competition; on the bright side, the commish avoids any hint of collusion or conflict of interest by maganmimously finishing in the bottom 4 for the second year on the trot.

Key players missing playoffs:  Pip Livers, Steven Jackson, Donald Driver


Playoff Matchups:

#1 Sportin' Woodleys (Finny) vs. #8 KeystoneCops (KeystoneKC)

Defending champ the Woodleys garner the #1 seed again, despite earning only the third most points this season.  Rumor has it Finny was caught using a webcam to secretly watch other managers set their line-ups, but was only slapped on the wrist with a fine of $37.50.  Aaron Rodgers and ADAP lead the attack for the Woodleys, while the KC's late charge was in part led to snagging waiver orphan (and former Chicken) Jamaal Charles late in the season.  Hard to see the top seed falling in this one (Rodgers gets a soft Chicago D, while KC must choose between Jason Campbell and Matt Ryan at qb), a matchup of two wily old bastards.

#2 Pure Steel II (Vinman) vs. #7 Spen's Angry Reds (Spen)

Everyone's favorite Baltimaroon, just two seasons removed from Fantasy Football's biggest and birghtest prize, limps into the playoffs as a 7 seed (10th overall points) to face a red-hot Pure Steel, riding a league-best 4 game winning streak on the receding hairline of Drew Brees.  Spen's got a shot in this one, though, with Flacco in a favorable matchup versus Detroit, and Ed Reed also in a favorable matchup versus Detroit.  He'll need it, because Brees will likely put up at least 25 versus Atlanta.

#3 DrunkDrivingKillers (kluisi) vs. #6 PlexyMidThighGunners (Y2Joyce)

Despite the outcry over the public image of MGS FFL, both these criminally-minded teams made it into the second season in '09.  The DDK's, who were the season leader in overall points, have a winning combination in Manning-to-Wayne.  At some point, however, he's gotta be worried about the perennial late season resting of the Colts' stars.  My guess is, it won't be until the championship round, in part because the PlexyGunners start too damn many Pitters.  In addition, Y2Joyce's crew must be feeling the sting of finishing yet again below the hated arch-rival Chickens.  The monkey remains for another year.

# 4 MSDMNR's Mongrels (msdmnr) vs. #5 Chickens of General Gao (penso)

The Mongrels lost a key matchup in week 13, costing them a higher seed, while the Chickens remain one of the league's enigmas.  Which Chickens will show up?  The 107-point squad of last week, or the team that 5 times failed to crack 75 points?  The Chickens broke with tradition in ignoring character issues leading up to this season, opting to keep low-life scumbag pastriots Beardy and Moss.  They may catch a break with Carolina visiting Foxboro this week, and the Ravoon's D getting Detroit; but something tells me the Chickens will be counted unless Farv throws it to the guys in orange and black this weekend.

[jonzr]

I was cheated!  The whole lotta ya is lyin' cheaters and cheatin' liars.     It was fixed!

[KeystoneKC]

...#1 Sportin' Woodleys (Finny) vs. #8 KeystoneCops (KeystoneKC)

Defending champ the Woodleys garner the #1 seed again, despite earning only the third most points this season.  Rumor has it Finny was caught using a webcam to secretly watch other managers set their line-ups, but was only slapped on the wrist with a fine of $37.50.  Aaron Rodgers and ADAP lead the attack for the Woodleys, while the KC's late charge was in part led to snagging waiver orphan (and former Chicken) Jamaal Charles late in the season.  Hard to see the top seed falling in this one (Rodgers gets a soft Chicago D, while KC must choose between Jason Campbell and Matt Ryan at qb), a matchup of two wily old bastards....

Missin' most of the draft, startin' 0-4, & being outscored by 10 other teams, the Cops are just glad to be here this year boys.  Now if only I can stay awake long enough for the outcome.  My only hope is that Finny nodds off before setting his line-up.  Double Nyquiltinis on me Fin.

[Finnegans Wake]

...#1 Sportin' Woodleys (Finny) vs. #8 KeystoneCops (KeystoneKC)

Defending champ the Woodleys garner the #1 seed again, despite earning only the third most points this season.  Rumor has it Finny was caught using a webcam to secretly watch other managers set their line-ups, but was only slapped on the wrist with a fine of $37.50.  Aaron Rodgers and ADAP lead the attack for the Woodleys, while the KC's late charge was in part led to snagging waiver orphan (and former Chicken) Jamaal Charles late in the season.  Hard to see the top seed falling in this one (Rodgers gets a soft Chicago D, while KC must choose between Jason Campbell and Matt Ryan at qb), a matchup of two wily old bastards....

Missin' most of the draft, startin' 0-4, & being outscored by 10 other teams, the Cops are just glad to be here this year boys.  Now if only I can stay awake long enough for the outcome.  My only hope is that Finny nodds off before setting his line-up.  Double Nyquiltinis on me Fin.

The Old Bastard Bowl.  Penso just FedExed me some spare Vicodin, with the explicit instructions not to take more than two if I have 5 or more NyQuiltinis.  Thanks, Pens, always looking out for a bud!

Great writeup, BTW, Pens.  And don't forget, this year's champ gets an XLIII program signed by Steeler legend Jack Ham, the man whose very name is a delicious pork product.

[msdmnr2002]

Hey, c'mon man, you're shortchanging me on my analysis.  I'm the favorite and it's all about your Chickens?  What gives?  Brady and Moss, that's all you can talk about?  What about my devastating RB trifecta?  The fact that the late season injury to Turner likely cost me a seeding, but hopefully he'll be back to compliment Jones-Drew and the aged but highly productive Thomas Jones?  And of course, all Favre all the time.

You'll be hearing from my agent.  Your homerism is hurting my endorsement potential.

[pensodyssey]

Hey, c'mon man, you're shortchanging me on my analysis.  I'm the favorite and it's all about your Chickens?  What gives?  Brady and Moss, that's all you can talk about?  What about my devastating RB trifecta?  The fact that the late season injury to Turner likely cost me a seeding, but hopefully he'll be back to compliment Jones-Drew and the aged but highly productive Thomas Jones?  And of course, all Favre all the time.

You'll be hearing from my agent.  Your homerism is hurting my endorsement potential.

Mea culpa.

On the bright side, you could use it as bulletin board material.


NOONE RESPECTS US!!!!  ITS THE MONGRELS AGAINST THE WORLD!!!

[msdmnr2002]

Let's see, let me try out the no respect card:

No one expected us to make the playoffs! Jones-Drew and Turner were way underrated coming into the season!  Everyone thought Favre was washed up!  Me too so I drafted him late as a backup, but that's beside the point!

Yeah, maybe that will work.

Honestly, good job on the writeup.

[Y2Joyce]

In addition, Y2Joyce's crew must be feeling the sting of finishing yet again below the hated arch-rival Chickens.

The regular season matters not, Mr. Pensod Howland-Schottenheimer. It's about winning the big bale of yarn. All the hay in the ball of wax. The whole Letang. So don't count your chickens....ya Chickens. Plus we beat yinzz guys already.

We Dey.

The monkey remains for another year.

Racist.

[Finnegans Wake]

My "Unleash Hell in the Playoffs" stratagem?  I'll be firing my OC shortly.  The one seed/defending champs the lowest scorers?  The 8 seed a scoring buzzsaw, blowing away all others in the league?  As of now, it's looking like KC may triple up on me.

Unless my Eagles receivers combine for 100.

Well played, old man.  Well played.

[jonzr]

Epic upset!  There will be a new champion this season. 

The Woodleys went limp
General's Chickens got plucked
Future is murky