Bring a seat cushion and your iPod.
See if Dick's Sporting Goods sells an Impure Thought counter you can wear to the service.
Well, I lived.
The people there, choir members, greeters, etc etc, all have some crazed giddy-ness about themselves simply, I assume, becasue they are at church on Sunday morning. They looked like I feel when I arrive in Vegas when I get the opportunity to go. I'm glad people have something enjoyable to focus on.
The pastor at this church is the dad of my daughter's friend, is a huge Steeler fan, and is the one that got tickets for the Steeler game in Denver this year, so listening to him was different than someone I din't know. Not much scripture quoting, but more of the "lets all be better people" message.
We went out to IHOP afterwards, so it was liveable.
Preach, I apologize for my comments, as I know this is your livlihood. I went every Sunday as a kid, Methodist church, and it just isn't for me. I hope I don't sound negative, just posting my experience, in hopefully a slightly comedic way.